Wednesday, November 12, 2008

Amputations galore

Id like to apologize for not posting in about a month.
Ive been busy with other things (like living, eating, masturbating).
This is not to mention that my notebook and its notes are coming to an end.
I still have my sisters but im not entirely sure (having not looked at it) whether i am capable of transcribing her notes into a story. It may be worth an attempt.
Im also tempted to start posting smut.
Im not kidding.
I just found some pages of a short story (or what looks to be a penthouse forum letter) i wrote a while back for another blog i never told anyone about. For good reasons. Regardless. Ill see what happens once this blog finishes and where my headspace is at.



Well, i saw my first amputation today.

I should specify that i didnt actually see it performed.

What i saw was the base of the leg with no foot on one leg and a foot with no toes on the other.

These two limbs had staples to heal them from getting infected. That shit never ceases to look medieval or like something out of 'The Great Big Civil War Book of Surgery".

Youd think this day in age we'd have finesse when sowing up these people.
No. Apparently a fucking staple gun will do.

Does this mean any idiot with a staple gun can be a doctor?
No. You need one of those masks as well.

Having indured such a painful surgery she was high as David Lee Roth on a saturday night in 1982 when i was first introduced to her. Initially, She seemed ok, however after her nap things went a little pear shaped.

She kept insisting that people "play through".

This of course was while she kept trying to put on pants (she had on a catheter) and 'finishing the tournament'. The lovely dear asked several times that someone could pick up her ball, which was located in her calender across from her bed. Damn what a sportsman. Lets see that Tiger Woods try something like that. Ffft. What a pussy.

I should say that in hindsight, i initially had no clue what sport the patient was talking about at the time. However, now that im older and wiser, i can safely say she was playing golf. Not water polo as some would have you believe.

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